I have been dating my boyfriend for 2 years and he has a jealous problem. Everytime I am out of state he thinks I am cheating on him or he don't like me to speak to men or he doesn't like men to look at me. When men flirt with me he wants me to be rude to them and I think that's wrong. As long as I don't talk to them or give them my number it shouldn't matter?
He is jealousy problem good or bad????How come? Good or Bad?
what is jealousy?
Taken literally, jealousy refers to a strong desire for someone else's stature or possessions. But in a social setting, it causes someone to be doubtful of their partner and feel threatened by their interaction with certain people, the clothes they wear, or the places they go.
But like I mentioned before, there are varying degrees of jealousy:
Cute jealousy
Jealousy does not necessarily merit its negative connotation, after all, it's normal for men to be suspicious of their women (and vice versa). Having reservations about her going to a strip bar with friends or not enjoying the sight of her drooling over some guy in a magazine are innocent examples of how some jealousy can be harmless, and a perfectly normal reaction.
Healthy jealousy
Likewise, a man who voices his concern over having his girlfriend go out with a bunch of guys or seeing another man flirting with her is also part of a healthy relationship. Oftentimes, a man is just looking out for his girlfriend's well-being and women usually respect that. They may even be insulted if you don't say anything.
Obsessive jealousy
The problem arises when aggression and/or violence accompanies the jealousy. Once you've reached this stage, you obsessively begin questioning her loyalty to you, and that sends you into a rage, maybe even using physical force.
You inherit an extremely low tolerance level and, before long, she is unable to even look at another guy or leave your side when you're both out. You demand to know where she is at all times and the mere mention of another guy's name sends you off the deep end.
Where does this jealousy stem from?
You may have acquired this behavior through past experiences with girlfriends. If you have already been cheated on, this may cause you to be more possessive and controlling of her for fear of repetition. Even if she's never given you any reason to doubt her, you become increasingly desperate to hold on to the relationship and want to avoid potentially hazardous situations at all costs.
Similarly, you may be the one who's been unfaithful in the past, and, in a shameful attempt to not have the tables turn on you, you want to ensure that you are the sole object of her desire.
But, for the most part, jealousy is a byproduct of one's own issues with self-confidence and self-esteem. You may feel that you're not good enough for her and that you're together by fluke. Most other guys seem better looking to you and you feel threatened by that.
Watching her interact with other men leaves you feeling worried that she may be ';stolen'; from you. If you've only been with her a short time, you may even be bothered by the close bond she has with her male friends, whom she's known all her life.
why is jealousy dangerous?
Jealousy , for those who can't control it, is detrimental to a relationship because it eats away at the one thing that holds it together: Trust. To tell your girlfriend or wife that she cannot have lunch with a male co-worker is to tell her that you don't trust her (unless she has really given you reason not to). If you have to impose so many restrictions, should you two even be together?
Jealousy also takes away from your quality time together as it would undoubtedly lead to numerous fights whereby you only focus on each other's negative qualities.
Furthermore, you end up spending the bulk of your day foolishly thinking up scenarios in which she may cheat on you. Before you know it, the greater part of your relationship will be spent on what could be happening rather than what is happening.
Jealousy will be harder to control as the relationship progresses, so if yours is reaching dangerously high levels, it's time to get help as soon as possible.How come? Good or Bad?
Insecurity can be bad. Anyone can get jealous. He shouldn't mind that men check you out. It's a natural thing that happens, even when he is not around. He shouldn't deprive you from talking to men. I'm sure he wouldn't like if you told him to stop talking to women. Question him. Ask him how he would feel if he was you. If men flirt with you, obviously you can't flirt back. This is disrespectful in your part. But there's a difference between flirting and complimenting. If they tell you how attractive you look, it's okay. He shouldn't get bother at all. They are just saying how good you look. Giving a thanks to them shouldn't be a issue to him. Your boyfriend has to learn to trust you as much as you do to him. This is one of the main ingredients to keep a steady relationship. No girl, like any guy, should be restricted from anything. If his behavior hurts you, you should leave him and move on. Good luck!
well Jackie, it looks like your boy friend is very insecure and really doesn't like your reaction to the attention your getting.You may not be ready for a monogamous relationship.
Love shouldn't hurt but we all know nothing hurts worst.
Face it he hurts, you're annoyed that he has this problem.
If he were with a girl that only responded to him and rejected all others with a look that would kill, he wouldn't be jealous at all.
Understand Jackie, I don't fault you at all, You guys are just in two different relationships.My opinion, I'm surprised it lasted two years , he's got it bad. You must really be something.
Good luck
jealousy is bad it can cause loads of problems %26amp; arguements try get him to cool it.
probably bad...usually this means HE IS GUILTY of something.
if you have done nothing wrong..then he needs to accept that. or you need to move on. People do stupid things when they are jealous.
It's bad. And it's not going to get any better.
Find someone who deserves you and trusts you. Relationships are built on trust- without that, you have nothing.
talk but make it clear your spoken for. dont flirt with the other guys, if your with another dude and hes seeing you flirting with other guys it wil only make him more insecure
its good that he wants u 2 be faithful its bad that hes 2 overprotective
He's pretty jealous, coz he thinks you'll realise that those other guys are better than he is, even if they arent, and he's sh*t scared that you might cheat on him, because clearly for him that would be an intense heartbreak.
So basically he cares about you, but doesnt trust you entirely. try do something to show commitment, and always make him feel like hes number 1 in your life, especially when he's complaining about that guy you just spoke to. But don't cut the amount of people you hang out with in half because of his issues.
Good or bad? Its subjective, dependant on what you want and whether you want it solved.
jealousy is bad no matter what and your boyfriend is taking it to the limits of being possessive and demanding towards you.
it is only natural that guys will look at girls. And do not be rude to those who are interested in you and are only looking at you.
If you start doing mean things to people because he told you to, then you are letting him know that he can control you. And that is not a good thing ..
As long as you are not doing anything to in courage these guys then you are not in the wrong.As long as you are not looking back with interest ...
That's bad. He sounds VERY insecure.
Insecurity in SOME men can lead to more dangerous problems down the road.
Threats, verbal and physical abuse. They can become SO controlling, that they destroy your whole world by leaving you with no freedom.
Watch him carefully.
The intensity of his jealous is BAD because it sounds like he's a very controlling person. You need to break up with him and don't look back. Trust me, I've been through relationships like this, NO good can possibly come out of it. If he says that he'll change, he'll only change for like at most a month, then he'll turn back to his ugly controlling manner.
bad, very bad. put him in his place before it gets worse.
he should learn to trust you. as for me I would not waste my time checking on what my girlfriend is doing. I would think that after two years he would learn to trust you. (unless you have shown him other wise) I have a very beautiful girlfriend and when people look at her of flirt with her (unless they are my friends) then it makes me realize how lucky I am to have her. I trust her completely. It is a much better feeling then wondering what is going on all of the time. so in a way it is a good thing maybe that he is jealous, because you know that he really has a lot of feelings for you. I just think that he is pushing it just a little to far. I would talk to him and let him know the way that you feel. It would make life a little easier for both of you...
Get rid of him.
My question to you is have you ever cheated before or does he knows that you had cheated before with your previous one.
For example, you cheated on your last boyfriend to get him. How does he know that you would not cheat on him to obtain the next one.
Bad, you are just a friendly person! I would dump him if he doesn't stop - you have to tell him his problem.
It's bad. He's either insecure or unfaithful himself or both. The only time men get overly jealous like that is when they're cheating themselves and they realize that while they're off banging some other chick, some other guy could be banging you.
bad
its not good
it's a bad problem. he's overprotective and insecure. ditch the loser. i think you should be allowed to talk to whoever you want.
thats a pretty bad probalem...he needs to chill and let u get ur groove on sometimes
its bad becouse you cant get to know new people
but it also proves his true love towards you
i dont think the ? is about jeslousy i think its about trust sounds to me that he does not trust u very much so thats not good trust i a relationship is like the #1 imp. thing. so wat u should do is talk to him about it and make sure that he knows that u r not goin to cheat on him.
bad. Sometimes, extreme jealousy can be a sign of two things: 1. It could be a sign that he is cheating, so he expects you to cheat as well.
2. It could be a sign of a controlling personality, wanting to limit your contact with people.
The question would be, have you ever given him a reason to not trust you? Has he ever caught you in a lie? Does he feel that the way you talk to men is inappropriate? Are you a flirt? Look at all those things to make sure that you are not doing anything that would cause him to be suspicious. Then, I'd sit down and talk to him and see if you can discover why.
It's bad..not healthy
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